“STOP IT.” This is the first part of my conversation with so many successful goal setting junkies who have over extended themselves and are running like a passenger in life on a treadmill. Time to just stop and reconnect with yourself and what is most important to you and jump into the driver’s seat once again.
People have been programmed to set goals, achieve them and set some more. I totally agree with goal-setting because it gives us purpose, passion and motivation. But mindless goal setting doesn‘t work. Goals that are set without considering three critical points, often lead to nowhere, can destroy confidence and burn women out.
These are my main tips for setting goals that nurture, nourish, inspire and motivate without destroying yourself or sabotaging your health or relationships.
1 Know thy self
Who are you at your core? Know your values and take the time to really know who you are and what is good for you and not just what others do. Set goals that add to your values. For example, mine is health (mental, physical and spiritual). So to set a goal that sabotages those leads to me being resentful, tired and feeling like I am the passenger. Saying no to some things has been my savior as goals for 2015 must be set to support my health.
2 Know the big picture
Know your big picture of what you are trying to achieve in a 3 year period. In 3 years where do you want to be? Where physically, mentally, professionally, financially and with your relationships? All goals set for right now need to support this, and if they don’t then you are being distracted. 80% of opportunity around us is a distraction, so be careful where you are pointing your goals.
3 Know the short term must dos
As you know yourself, and your bigger picture, the short term ‘must do’s’ should be a short sharp list of 3-5 things that really support you. For example, for me these include mindfulness, focused diary management, drawing a line of when it is rest time, and education (spending a year of listening to audiobooks whilst I walk to keep myself upskilled and inspired.) They are the must do’s that will ensure success for me.
So when you go to set your personal and professional goals stop. Don’t just set goals. Don’t just be an achievement junkie who becomes resentful and burnt out and out of control. Think them through, take your time and ensure that they are good for you, that they support you and that you are the driver of them and no one else.
Many women juggle many roles so we need to be careful and think about what we really want. What is most important to us has to come first and the goals need to be set around this. Everything else will flow through if we let it and we will grow and evolve in the direction we want to go.
I invite you to try setting goals this way, just a few goals at a time that have meaning and depth and share below your comments.